Perhaps one of the most important tantric precepts is to love yourself, which quite simply means that you should not compromise your own happiness, even if it alleviates relationship tension temporarily. This is not to say that anyone should leave their lover because of a brief lack of relativity, but that a heart-to-heart communication is better had while a relationship still has life in it than afterward, when you have compromised to the extent of losing yourself in the all-important “relationship.”
It is necessary to impress upon your lover how important your spiritual life is to you, so they know what they are in for. It is not uncommon for two lovers to drift apart when one has tasted the peaceful dimension that is beyond their partner’s capacity to comprehend it. Whatever you want to do—do it with or without your partner, yet if you are agreed to be monogamous, then give them the option to take the journey with you as it pertains to tantra. This is a sensitive issue, we realize, yet know this: the spiritual path presents many difficulties and challenges, so the last thing you want feeding the ego (should it arise, and it usually will) is for the ego of you and your partner to feed on each other. It is likely that, if this is the case and your partner lacks the conscious presence to support you and assist you during this critical period, you will end up creating unnecessary complications in life when you might have better allowed each other to go your own way.
On the other hand, the conflict can also become your greatest lesson: Does your partner support you? As it pertains to tantric sex, is your partner supportive of you having other partners? This is where things can get a bit sticky, so it is best to ask them to assist you until they have a taste of the ecstasy that cannot be denied. Then you will have a difficult time slowing them down, not that you would want to 
